I have been thinking about myself a lot lately. I know that sounds really vain, but bear with me. I have been contemplating my strengths and weaknesses. For some reason, medical school makes me very introspective. Being married tends to bring that out, too. I am constantly thinking about what I can do better and what I should just forget about because it's just not going to change. So I have compiled a list of things that I'm not very good at but that I want to and think that I can change about myself.
1. I'm quite anal. I mean, I guess that makes sense because I majored in engineering, and engineers are very particular. For example, when doing the ECG homework, most people in our class just counted the boxes under the curve to approximate the area. Did I do that? No, it's too easy and definitely not precise enough. In fact I used geometry and a little calculus to approximate the area with more accuracy. Needless to say, I did it three different ways, and I got the same answer as the people who just counted boxes...
2. I tend to be really hard on myself. I know everybody says that they are, but how bad is it when I am not satisfied with a B on a test.....in medical school? I mean, a B is really good, and yet...I'm not satisfied without an A. Maybe I'll just never be satisfied. I think I need a new study strategy or something.
3. I have lofty goals, and then I don't typically achieve them at quite the level I expect of myself. Even if I achieve the goal, somehow it's just not right. I either achieved it the 'wrong' way or it was too easy or something like that. I'm so ridiculous.
4. Finally, I tend to freak out and overreact to things. I'm not really sure how to explain this, so I'll just leave it at that.
I think I need to stop being so introspective. It's not always good. I'm depressing myself...
Off to study physiology!!
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3 comments:
1) I don't even KNOW how to do it the non-estimating way. GO YOU! :-)
2) I think we all feel that way, at times. Anyway, one B can be brought up. It's the final grades that count.
3) You ARE ridiculous! Be happy with your achievements, and don't try to downplay them.
4) You are a GIRL!
Lol. In all seriousness, I am crap when it comes to advice. I enjoyed reading this, though, and I hope you get things figured out. I look forward to more introspection and LIGHTHEARTEDNESS! Let this be your place to escape. :-)
Soooo I think that everyone in medical school is like this. We wouldn't be able to get in/handle it if we weren't type A, right? And remember that you are very smart because you are able to explain ECG's to me on a 1st grade level!
don't worry. i think half of our class could also claim some of those... :) med school definitely makes you look at your life in a completely different way. sometimes good, sometimes bad.
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